Dear Library

25 Oct

Dear Library,

I adore libraries. Obviously: they’re buildings with books. For free. Even if books aren’t your style, they have movies. My one complaint is that they should allow food. I hate reading without eating.

And I understand that I’m part of a school system– the California State Universities– that is hurting like a stake stabbed under your thumbnail right now. They’re hurting so badly that when the graduate student union asked the president of my university to waive tuition for TAs (a standard practice across the country so that the meager sums they pay us to teach their courses don’t immediately go back to them in the form of US paying for OUR classes), he said that we shouldn’t worry about tuition. Because the university might shut down. Tomorrow.

If that isn’t a reason to exercise fee deferment eligibility, I don’t know what it is.

But, Library! I turned that book in on Monday! I don’t think hitting me up for late fees for a book that you lost is the way to go.

Me: So I turned that book in. To the box that says “Return Books Here.” Was I not supposed to do that?

Library Guy: When’d you turn it in?

Me: The day it was due.

Library Guy: It says here you haven’t turned it in yet.

Me: ….

Library Guy: Ok, I’ll fill out this form here claiming you SAY you “turned it in.”

Me: What then?

Library Guy: We’ll look for it. You’ll hear back from us in about five weeks. If we can’t find it, we’ll charge you for the book.

Me: But I turned it in.

Library Guy: Sure you did. If we can’t find it, then we charge you for it.

Me: Really? That’s how you’re going to play this?

Rumor is they charge more than the book retails for. Rumor is this has happened to at least 4 people that I know. I think I’m getting scammed. By the smallest, most white-collar, liberal-intelligentsia crime ring ever. You’d think they could just ask for donations.

What’s even better is that it’s a book that was sent over from the nearest University of California school. A system which gives their graduate TAs tuition waivers. It was a book that my poor, broke-ass library doesn’t even have.

OH THE INHUMANITY.

MM

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