Dear Professors

29 Aug

Dear Professors,

I understand that you want us to look over the syllabus before the semester starts. I even understand that you want us to read some things, sometimes, before the semester starts— and look, two very very short stories is a totally acceptable amount of reading to do before class on Monday. 

And I get that you want us to have a hard copy of the syllabus! I do! Even in this technophile world, it’s nice to all sit there and stare at the same thing together on the first day, our little fingers following along as you read the whole thing out loud to us even though we are in the process of earning what might be considered, seen in a certain light, a very very advanced reading degree. We are extremely, totally literate people.

BUT GUYS. What’s this “find the syllabus online and print it out and bring it to class” business? The syllabus is the LAST thing you are responsible for providing for us (books: no, stories: online, each other’s work: we photocopy). Did the department put a ban on FACULTY using the photocopier? 

This is going to be a grim year, folks. When my professors ask us to bring potluck now, I’m going to wonder if the university has slashed their salaries so badly they’re trying to get themselves fed before they go home. 



PS– It’s the first day of my supposedly last year of school ever! WAH re: first day. Summer is cool. I like it. It is mayor of my heartsville. I am totally that graduate student who is like, “But I get so much work done when I don’t have classes!” …I read a lot of books this summer. 

PPS– I say “supposedly last year” because let’s be honest. If I last two years without the academic calendar, we’ll all be shocked. I’m casting about for things to apply for now out of sheer fear of being released into the wild. Would you like to see my GRE scores? Can I get you a letter of recommendation with that muffin? Just please let me print my own syllabus and eat it for dinner.


2 Responses to “Dear Professors”

  1. Ryan Forsythe (@RyanAForsythe) 2 September 2011 at 2:54 pm #

    I tried to leave (higher) Ed a few times. But I keep coming back to him, I think because I LOVE taking that GRE. And no, I’m not being funny.

    • margaret michelle 6 September 2011 at 10:54 am #

      We’re going to talk about this next time I see you in person.

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