Dear California Highway Patrol

12 Apr

Dear California Highway Patrol,

Real-life Super Troopers. Yeah, baby.

You are everywhere these days. There are almost as many of you between me and school as there are fro-yo shops.

And I just– ok, well, first of all, those boots. Like something out of an 18th century English novel with dark undertones of S & M and just begging for curtained alcoves of debauchery and foppery.

Honestly, it’s all I can do not to drop my handkerchief and giggle.

I just— it seems— well. I’m sure this doesn’t need saying. You’ll probably laugh at me. It just– it just couldn’t be…well, here goes nothing:

You aren’t trying to solve the budget crisis through speeding tickets, are you?

That seems like a tactic Arizona would try.





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