Dear Napoleon Bonaparte

10 Feb

Dear Napoleon Bonaparte,

As much as I would love that giant oil painting of   you in a gilded frame, I just think $1600 is a little much.

No? Just right? Perfect for my small studio otherwise filled with Ikea lamps and random prints and poems tacked up on my closet door?

I mean, giant ornate gold frames never go out of style, right?

Is there any price too high to pay to feel like each time I walk out the door, you are urging me on to success in every campaign, whether that be mailing my netflix DVD or withdrawing cash from the ATM or buying a doughnut from the doughnut shop across the street (which is not great but is close and I wish another, greater doughnut shop would open and can you make that happen)?

Really, we all need to feel like conquering heroes every now and then.

Maybe there is no price too great to pay. Too bad you’re facing left, which would be into my apartment. And while I sometimes need a cheerleader to help me beat back the dishes or vanquish the dust bunnies, it just seems a little weird to have you essentially leading the charge on my bed.




One Response to “Dear Napoleon Bonaparte”

  1. skhor 11 February 2011 at 7:04 pm #

    I think “leading the charge on my bed” just made my week.


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