Dear People who Change Their Names on Facebook

1 Nov

Dear People who Change Their Name on Facebook,

I DON’T KNOW WHO YOU ARE!

Why is it important to have a silly moniker on a place that is designed to allow people to find you?

And if you don’t want to be found, WHY ARE YOU ON FACEBOOK?

It makes me feel funny in my spine when my newsfeed is full of names I don’t know.  Like maybe I’m part of a government secret brain-wave test.  Because this (life) is that type of movie.  Obviously.

Now fix yourselves so you suit my needs.

MM

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3 Responses to “Dear People who Change Their Names on Facebook”

  1. margosita 1 November 2010 at 9:57 am #

    I just don’t get it. I mean, I guess if you get married and you change your name it makes sense. (Though I’m still going to judge you.) But what’s with people just chopping off their last names? Usually girls who become Firstname Middlename. Is this so employers have a harder time finding them? Or it sounds better? OR WHY!?

    • margaret michelle 1 November 2010 at 11:03 am #

      Seriously! And the guys I know who do it change their names completely! To random things that almost sound like real names: Nolman Johnsoln.

      I’ve almost defriended people because, um, I don’t know a Mohnsie Michille. Nor do I want to know a total creepster like Frankie Beastt. Total creepster, that Frankie Beastt. Now I’m going to name a character that, because it’s kind of awesome.

  2. Doctor Whickammy McFiggle 14 March 2011 at 11:15 am #

    Well, what a bunch of silliness.

    I can understand why people would get irritaded about someone changing their name more than once in real life, but to worry about
    whether they do it on some silly internet page seems to me to be a very overly uptight attitude.

    You people are starting to this ‘facebook’ thing way too seriously.

    You should consider getting to know more ‘wierd’ people so that you won’t be so creeped out by quirky individuality.

    But

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